I truly learned the meaning of the phrase “we make plans and God laughs at them” with the birth of my daughter, Zora Mae. It's an event that was full of twists and turns throughout the entire day. A day that was earlier than October 1st, the date my doctors and I chose for me to be induced. I was diabetic and because my blood glucose was high at the end of my pregnancy they weren’t going to let me go past 37 weeks. Zora couldn’t wait that long though. She made her grand and dramatic entrance into this realm on September 29th in the predawn hours. It was by far one of the scariest moments of my life. And the most transformative.
I had stayed up all night before I went to my take my last non stress test. Zora kicked and rolled around inside of me all night so my plan was to go take the non stress test, come home, eat, take a nap, and then start organizing all of the baby shower gifts that had taken over our living room. This is how I thought my day would go. Then God laughed. Zora didn’t pass the non stress test and I was immediately admitted into the hospital to be induced into labor. Within the course of 30 minutes our day had taken a surprising turn.
Everything was going well after the induction. I was in some pain but it didn’t feel much stronger than period cramps. It was my plan to have an unmedicated birth, but yet again, things didn’t go according to my well thought out plans. I was induced early in the afternoon and I had been up for over 24 hours. I couldn’t really sleep through the contractions so after being offered an epidural several times I accepted so I could get some rest. That turned out to be one of the best decisions I’ve made in my entire life. Getting an epidural earlier in the day may have saved my daughter’s life.
After the epidural, I got some much needed rest and everything seemed to be going well. Things were going so well that my contractions felt orgasmic. The epidural numbed me to the pain and all that was left was joy and pleasure. I had been in labor for about 8 hours and was 6 or 7 centimeters dilated when Zora’s heart rate started dropping. With every contraction she was in distress. I suspect it was the pitocin that caused this to happen but of course the doctors would never admit it. When her heart rate went down to 120 bpm we decided to go through with a c section. Zora was born and I heard her do a faint cry and then nothing. For 14 minutes she had stopped breathing. I was somewhat unaware of what was going on. The anesthesia had my mind cloudy. I kept asking what was going on with the baby as my husband held my hand. He stood there watching as the medical team was doing CPR on Zora. The only reason her heart started again is because they gave her a shot of epinephrine. She still has the scar on her chest from it. This was hands down the scariest experience of both of our lives.
I am recounting this story because I’ve been studying astrology lately. Like for real. I’ve dabbled for years but lately I’ve taken the study more seriously and I’ve come to realize that within our natal charts are the blueprints for our lives. I think about the circumstances of my daughter’s birth and realize that it’s true when they say that we choose certain aspects of our lives before we’re born. I came to that conclusion by studying the natal charts for me, my husband, and Zora. For example; I have the Moon in the 11th house square Mars in the 2nd house. My daughter has this exact same aspect in her chart. The signs are different but the geometry is the same. The Moon is the emotions and Mars is passion and anger. A square is a harsh aspect between two planets. When the Moon and Mars face off that can make for a person with an explosive temper. Zora definitely has my temperament! We be in here going at it. My husband laughs and then tells me "she is your mirror". And it's true, she is!
The Moon is the fastest moving object in the Zodiac. It changes signs every 2.5 to 3 days. If Zora would have been born on the date that I was supposed to be induced the Moon would have been in Leo instead of Cancer. She wouldn’t have inherited that part of my personality. From my observation, the natal chart can point to our genetic inheritances as well as our psychology. I made plans for her to be born on October 1st or 2nd, but CLEARLY God and Zora had other plans. She was born on an 8♥️ day. I’m an Ace♠️ which makes our composite card the 9♠️ . The 9♠️ is my lifetime Saturn card. Saturn is a karmic planet. The 9♠️ is a card of death and transformation. Zora literally died and cane back to life. The experience transformed my life and her father's. Everything about the way she was born indicates that there were forces beyond my control at play. My desires do not supersede her fate. Perhaps that’s the truth behind the phrase “we make plans and God laughs at them”. I’m not going to say that I wouldn’t go back and change anything about the experience, because it was traumatic for all of us, but I see the divine order in how everything played out.
Here's a recent photo of Zora Mae. She'll be 2 at the end of this month. After she was born the doctors were trying to prepare us for the worst. She has defied all expectations and is thriving today. She's a lil firecracker (sun conjunct mars) and it is a joy to see her develop and grow into an amazing person.